Tectonic Tuesday: Natalie Portman

I'm sure the great visionary, the Imam of Imams Hojatoleslam Kazem Sedighi, would agree that the only thing more dangerous than an immodest woman, is an immodest woman who was brought into this world through the the nefarious machinations of the Zionist Conspiracy!



Nineteenth Case Study: Natalie Portman

Natalie Portman, winner of the 2011 Academy Award for Best Actress, was born in Israel in 1981. Reportedly the child of an "artist" and a "fertility expert," she was mostly created by them in a top secret Zionist weapons lab and unleashed upon the world with the intention of creating havoc and destruction. It is not a coincidence that her debut film role at the age of 12 in "Leon the Professional" was described by some critics as "Lolita-esque". Nor was it surprising that an earthquake struck the Al Hoceima region in the northern Morocco, leveling towns and killing hundreds.

Portman has flaunted herself in over 30 movies since her debut, and each one has threatened lives around the world. She welcomed the new millennium with an earth-shattering role in "Home is Where the Heart Is", which caused the Baku earthquake that damaged churches and mosques, but no synagogues. More recently she pranced around in skin-tight outfits and had all kinds of sex on screen in "Black Swan". Predictable, a series of massive earthquakes have struck in New Zealand, damaging over 100,000 homes in the city of Christchurch and killing hundreds.

All because of the immodesty of Natalie Portman. And the sinister agents of the Zionist Conspiracy!